Subject: Fw: Story from a husband - please read it slowly
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When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms
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On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped
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front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of $ P3 O$ {8 C$ l3 j' r( J% @0 h9 z
the
2 n$ |- u; x; ]- {" q" @car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and 5 V7 d& ^& Z0 r, I$ V! r
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I was a strong and happy bridegroom.8 ~8 {% M* B* p
1 I- E' n1 E4 h0 g1 ~. hThis was the scene ten years ago.& W1 Y* V- p7 |
; B+ k, l. w, k, I/ NThe following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; ! v% a+ L" `& f' \
I
% P j% x" v9 w% y+ M. F8 Rwent into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were* p& i. P3 H8 z7 `3 S3 X3 u9 d
steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a
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! e" v" i! k* Gservant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the
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time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. ?, z) v& {4 F/ Y
/ J0 S* d( m5 O7 q( `' t- cOur marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
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likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.6 l8 {3 N$ g1 ?6 \+ F' N- t( Q% r% f
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Dew came into my life.! L9 K" \/ S8 ?; e
& x [2 x. F S2 B2 gIt was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from" [8 K _- [' B9 L& }
behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This
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apartment I bought for her.
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0 N. z `2 @, m$ m5 F5 n: WDew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her
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suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife
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Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.0 g9 p* B: R$ v/ ?7 [4 S; ]
- F4 P' d$ B6 O! vThinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my
/ ?3 g7 u, O z" h% A/ X' a( Zwife.. But I couldn't help doing so.7 z3 W% T1 f+ {9 x" l+ p8 w1 T5 Q
4 ^* i2 u! J8 L, j2 R$ SI moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, 1 y$ r9 S* } [! e, {# z) @
O.K.?
3 k: \( J: P' d4 LI've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, & s0 w3 `* Q+ x0 j
because
/ n' D( c8 x7 V$ kI had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of2 i* W0 ^; {% `- }
divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something0 {* R+ j' ]% Q5 @4 D3 _
impossible to me. I1 P( Q0 W" R; R6 e" B
9 [1 K* `0 q6 \4 b; n9 j; t! kHowever, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No
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mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
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2 |+ I" M+ y/ s* F1 K. aHonestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing
, u7 ` k4 I) E& w0 @+ Bdinner.
8 Y! P' ?5 I" jI was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we
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' ?& C- E: s7 u9 r) h$ u8 vTV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's
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) t8 J+ @1 K# F7 ]! CThis was the means of my entertainment.
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One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce,
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will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word.
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she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I 2 P! ]+ i" {/ i4 v
couldn't3 d; e( h% P2 ^5 |; J
imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
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5 D- q; S) W. W ZWhen my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all : Z9 d8 _- S- J2 J5 g$ u) S
the
1 R, `( B/ y% e! }2 E6 A1 `staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide 7 i/ \6 N, ]9 u
something) Q8 b5 ~' @7 d7 T2 d
while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently / ]' H, k+ I5 G
smiled at" }% ]: s, p# f
my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.% o" \: r0 l+ V+ S; V9 z' |( G
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Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live+ x4 U; M) d* @) u3 A* c
together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.6 M( Q0 |; H! q) A7 }
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When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something
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* ]$ V T! p, e% @6 P" `# Y! ~tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the ) r$ }( w N; a
hurt in
7 w! ?+ C& [3 ~/ ]3 L% B9 rher eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let ( C% U! r1 b) ]8 R( [
her
: N3 k6 H3 l+ Cknow what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic9 _# t, D, m. D$ t
calmly.
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, D# g; W7 l" n3 {She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly,
' @' k* t0 e8 F! [) x9 Bwhy?
+ t a8 N- \& Q, W1 K! V9 Y# OI'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her
$ A3 ^( ~2 y7 e9 G3 r" k6 Langry..
) q9 I: p8 ?3 }; c5 mShe threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
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That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
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to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give
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0 N2 k" Q/ j% w& n( Z# Jsatisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
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With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
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; h% T% @7 j( @ t7 Eshe could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She 9 y G; O! E; J" A% n1 T
glanced" K: A+ g5 m( s5 F* u# Q7 R
at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The 4 n8 ~; e9 c5 l# o% Z; I
woman who% k$ y% y$ J; z" K n
had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But * X& u/ D% `( M! y3 i2 c
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could not take back what I had said.
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Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected * J( M5 R- L( V* j7 N- A
to$ [- @/ h, H( M4 r( z
see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce ' w% G; A# O+ z0 H
which
' L! d3 @# M. d% Z/ r/ v) \- Hhad obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.. k8 S8 ~* @9 o7 F- {
% x* M9 ?0 t1 f" Z: Z' [+ o! Y& x7 ELate that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw * ^+ v+ t( P7 U. B" E) ]9 \
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writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I " B1 S# B' |) g2 y
found
9 V0 V) P. y9 E7 a1 gshe was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
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She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from 5 G: d+ q8 v l. S1 d$ r
me, but/ h8 g- M E5 N/ v9 B
I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the
4 Z; a, k n: J f/ u* vmonth's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was4 a8 G8 v- M& Z ~
simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she, s% ~2 N: ?. X
didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.; o9 P2 X) X; x' [' F
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She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do
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" c, E! R5 K9 [- Lstill remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This9 a1 t6 @: }3 U1 e; Q
question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I - j# @& q: Z/ R5 s- m4 w0 X
nodded3 Y" X+ l+ j) G+ Y) G
and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I
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a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when j& C" U, K+ u. M. t0 ^5 C
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divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from
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bedroom to the door every morning.7 N5 B; ~. L9 x- ], S2 e2 u1 p* G" c- N
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I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished - d8 R2 ?( F* Z" f1 K' K
to3 [/ Q1 _9 ` `) q0 N2 d" X
end her marriage romantically.3 O# J8 X/ g* t2 r( Y9 B
$ ?- N; S, G& r. cI told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
- |) L/ j* @$ R! H, Nthought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face
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( I8 a7 w* {, V0 cresult of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me
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uncomfortable.7 `, ~( Z4 }- n P
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My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention
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9 p7 \- P# W3 P1 `' y+ e, wexplicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when
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carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son ! a" a' @& s0 m+ c5 T- d' j- I+ [8 Y
clapped& k4 k. `# E, D( E1 x
behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a
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" S i3 c$ i( l5 A7 e s/ rof pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I
: d2 o; \0 N8 ?, [0 r8 x2 S& w9 _walked& {/ l4 N. M. T! H; o8 M; Q
over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said - S8 L' ]4 ]0 |
softly,$ F6 `0 G6 ?+ G- ]1 `. H
Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat
% u2 O) _) B8 ?+ l3 U% X0 tupset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I ) \6 I8 k* D( u) \' y' z! M
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to the office.( f# y5 N) A% W! K) A
: r! W4 U/ x1 ?6 v1 A# x0 fOn the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my% ]; k6 P- N& y' V- `3 j3 t7 D- _
chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse.
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( Z6 q! f) q$ M, \* v9 K: y5 O. mrealized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a
, M' h$ y4 @; P# g% ?long
4 N" V0 O: a' B4 Htime. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles
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" j$ i. U- i& y! N( Y! j4 eher face.' }' v7 u6 u9 _2 W8 T d N/ U
& o/ t) |3 r( W, q! h7 POn the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being
7 d1 C- e. ~$ l9 t8 |+ }; Cdemolished. Be careful when you pass there.) p% Q. D# U; r( h& t1 g$ J) J
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On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were
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an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The- U; \6 T& }/ t. R
visualization of Dew became vague.
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9 Y f o7 g4 w) J7 h& x) V: kOn the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as,
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2 u* w# P! V0 e z( w9 x% V$ wshe put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I
% m7 R: U; X: {nodded. g5 s8 I! F2 y _5 u6 w9 p
The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.
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1 z9 M; n" I' O! L* H# MI felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me4 \* U/ a( @8 U2 Q& c' `! b6 G
stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She $ p3 W0 x2 H5 |2 h7 b$ z
was
0 H# m! w# S$ ^/ a) wpicking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a
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but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have! q; b+ c7 W! P" O8 s6 P
grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she 2 S7 y9 S4 _$ P
was ~' y6 u: ^/ r6 V5 C: j
thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. : s/ K; V* l- I: N1 p1 I
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knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a 9 R+ n0 [5 P% R' Y2 N
sense
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& N/ G" R# B$ k) SOur son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He
7 u. a$ ?0 W9 Tsaid. To
$ q/ y! m2 C7 w/ j# Z) Ihim, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential
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# R! {" r+ `, u4 ~5 X/ A z% N2 rhis life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I1 B& \# M) S; P, N: g
turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last
6 S3 I3 s' Z7 B, P" n1 V* q0 Zminute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the : ^1 Z. y$ v8 c5 P1 A$ d
sitting
& }! m" z {$ A3 l; k& Broom, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. 0 o @9 J7 Z- A. Y3 L/ x
I
& u$ t* l; l( Q9 Gheld her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her + G/ E2 i: ^, [- B7 t
much2 Q; }) S' U0 U% p3 x
lighter weight made me sad.
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. _6 ?! I" k! @! {On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. 7 }' T5 c! q5 \: V
Our
5 H6 X: g/ \4 u% Kson had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in
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arms until we are old.
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I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life4 C9 T) S, g7 _9 Q- n' j: R
lacked intimacy.8 O2 h5 `5 ^* T) M2 P V
$ v9 ]# h' J/ K9 jI jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid
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delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened
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( }8 c* M* q/ O& E% tdoor. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.! o& `- p% z+ m- D" {/ m i
/ k4 j# j0 _6 m) J* [She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no9 e, j. V k- z" x
fever.. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I ) l6 ?+ E# C: l7 H* F
can
; |% ^, q4 |- z, K: W) A% oonly say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring 1 v' Q+ Z, }' j+ _) l. i; g
probably
: P4 {- D5 I, W5 M4 P6 Dbecause she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we 0 ~7 h( d" ?- u) ~/ T) e4 A9 @
didn't
* w& T. V# B# H p( }love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her + R) L( _! m! @# N
into the
/ W1 O7 m$ p! f# W8 p+ C Whome, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am ; c0 t2 E5 E1 g) H, U
old.) f& U% P) S0 S6 R
So I have to say sorry to you.& ~4 T8 ]& c1 }7 [0 ^: n6 w
. C. T* G O4 @- W) J7 [Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then 1 l1 {1 |5 Q4 K" U; ]* u+ r0 d
slammed the
" s$ W+ A3 z6 ^/ T) x \door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.+ b. ~. L. Z+ p
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When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my
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7 \. T) {2 S. a2 w4 X2 J9 Pwhich was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the
9 U6 Z4 s8 m% c% k& M) j B; |! ]8 rcard. I# s4 U1 ]5 Z! k9 K8 S- [: G
smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.
