Subject: Fw: Story from a husband - please read it slowly* w5 Q' Y) @7 O, ^
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* ^2 y0 T& O9 e) ZWhen You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms, ?! v. L8 _4 H y
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On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped 0 i2 w8 a* @9 p6 g1 d3 |+ M* O: w
in
8 `8 {0 x- N- @ |- Efront of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of 0 x7 U* ~; N! L
the7 h4 N' G( ?6 r& m$ V9 N- B
car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and % C; T. V g+ M c* j
shy..
" I% J# t1 h( `9 R% QI was a strong and happy bridegroom.7 [$ p$ B; k9 x" y8 \) c
. l, y0 k3 v$ r! n3 r" K9 PThis was the scene ten years ago./ U. e1 G" R& `
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The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid;
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' a% T0 G% r9 n; Z0 k' Awent into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were
" Y) A3 Z- v% }steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a ) [8 O3 J; J: H. c4 h
civil; L l- |; Y* s- ^
servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the
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time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.! o# ?- e2 p2 F
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Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
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likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
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. d/ n: t; f9 p9 wDew came into my life.+ m9 I9 c W1 E
/ L! G D: H: QIt was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from
. |5 h6 P, a1 W7 n6 {9 {) k* ubehind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This
! @2 R0 s, u; {1 Zwas the
0 |% @( _9 F4 A3 z+ k; B+ D3 P; Kapartment I bought for her.
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: Z3 C ^& X) B3 H) g. B" KDew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her
$ A; Q& x. E& p; x- Fwords( m+ k5 S8 V: L# h6 z1 \
suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife
5 [9 R. k2 l. t5 A6 q# i8 a0 Usaid,
( M' h: t0 \' x% u6 B( xMen like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.' |8 A2 G9 J L5 z2 d
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Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my
6 Q: W: _. z. m- Dwife.. But I couldn't help doing so.: |9 K, ~2 z' p; V( f- U1 Q
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I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture,
3 Z) o; e, b! aO.K.?
& d2 q3 r$ g7 _% |2 v7 _I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, 4 i" p4 W1 ` j$ _$ ]
because4 W' N( T" }4 s; O9 C s
I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of
2 N0 G! s5 B; x/ j: k8 udivorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something
! E* k+ J" E7 y' s3 uimpossible to me.6 o+ i+ K' f1 r1 x) |& ^
9 ?; H, l3 ~# d+ `5 |) EHowever, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No
$ Y- D* K5 O3 Y( Y/ qmatter how: s, m% |9 |* ]4 _% w$ U8 P
mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
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2 V6 u6 W1 t0 ~Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing
1 ~- K4 I' O [& J; n( T |4 sdinner.
* d3 e8 r/ }7 u5 q! H6 l( tI was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we
. {7 A6 g8 n" t6 X4 I* dwatched
/ {$ @' I4 R P" L. a3 M. tTV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's 5 S7 o; W2 M& u7 A( A
body./ d( G. E# o; A' m6 i$ M7 b$ v
This was the means of my entertainment.4 n( ^. k4 @4 t0 W- E
" q: Y0 j5 ^# _One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce,
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will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. : s. n+ d3 ^: U& K. ~
Apparently
& ^: {+ o1 h) C* fshe believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I $ S* q1 o9 I) [+ z* ~# O
couldn't7 \0 |1 t8 ?0 g7 |/ E" t7 s
imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
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When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all / W- s' ]- J( ?% D6 }, h
the; x2 r. t0 L8 ?& f& {! n; t5 `; H. g
staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide
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while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently J O c4 K! Q% U. [$ l2 y
smiled at1 ^* O3 c6 T% O% p6 B1 C/ _# }
my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes. C/ f- Y, A. u0 j, R
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Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live V$ u( }$ G ?! H4 { Q% D
together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
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When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something - u0 S/ H' T/ D/ _
to
5 `, B5 I; D; T7 ytell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the
2 ~6 Q$ i6 v& {7 C3 ohurt in
" O3 O# ~( S! a2 g2 x9 `- yher eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let
6 k% j' C. ]; e+ |& I- n8 G: h# Iher
7 y, ^) N9 t: h$ O* ~' Kknow what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic
% K- L1 W, L2 d4 K8 t) ?7 ycalmly.( C) U- k! t: k+ b7 c/ Q) g
5 h/ O g( q& _: P# h4 w3 `She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly,
C* v/ N, c- }% \why?7 G. n* k% _- D
I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her + ]0 B. F2 W2 J# g6 o% R4 k
angry..* \ B, ?" x0 y' }' J
She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!% H" Y) s) P, k0 Z- w1 H
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That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
0 l( N5 C) m+ S; \* Fwanted
; v+ a$ W7 G6 p! L# c* f: Eto find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give $ v6 p6 N4 r* C# J' K) H7 G! T
her a
. ^! d" X R" K2 ^2 D- Qsatisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
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8 Z. v/ d8 M/ TWith a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
' L* a j6 m2 k/ `8 N% I( \7 tthat
7 D# q- {! x% m( |! R4 |she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She 4 u; U* U, F1 I& C* J
glanced0 F: m* J& l- s( Y
at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The
2 ]/ S. O1 _) S% w# \7 i6 Iwoman who
* U- w: p' g5 I( `had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But
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& Z+ `& l" p T! \could not take back what I had said.0 b* f& Z# f2 t
- K' T# k# m) c, ] }/ }5 RFinally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected 9 t0 W& b# ?6 g# F8 i( m" `
to
, T1 X3 l7 l" R6 D: P- X3 q% d$ bsee. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce
0 i- S0 F# [$ cwhich
, i! U9 I' R$ b! ^5 f/ i) zhad obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.- P3 `3 K3 S) ]. f* v4 I) V+ t9 I
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Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw " ?6 O( R. D* t& r9 X8 R
her
% h, L1 @; c6 ]* R4 d3 ? ^writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I % y) K: m1 d& U& N+ { @0 E0 M6 P9 n9 {. _; r
found, B. U9 C8 E6 Y+ e& x* t8 c+ u1 W
she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.* \, ]* V! h9 _: t
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She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from
& w0 U' w: {! H* ~5 [1 [me, but- a# ]" Z7 U7 G* m+ Q8 Y% }
I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the
1 w1 _& \+ E0 E6 E4 lmonth's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was
* r, S$ E( [* s- N$ |, Z% jsimple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she
" h2 D7 E- w% A2 sdidn't want him to see our marriage was broken.7 R$ b( A* R1 N8 j+ }
" K( `6 O6 z0 V' dShe passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do
2 W+ m2 t- [/ gyou
3 l! f! w7 z% P6 J! W# b% mstill remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This7 Z' y$ u+ R, h
question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I Z+ W; \4 f0 _2 r6 ]( d7 [% g
nodded H: d. I# {) i/ }' s2 P
and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I o6 r$ N" @- L, @& F( _( e
have
$ V7 o2 x9 f3 x. m2 V3 K; |$ Ga requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when $ B5 `/ p% ?, y9 a% m
we- {2 p2 u0 y' _8 [; a
divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from
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bedroom to the door every morning.
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4 e0 t8 R; j* u/ S* P$ T4 gI accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished + R# u4 n2 o% u6 t" K
to. c8 t1 A: ?" P) I& r7 U( e. z9 s4 P
end her marriage romantically.3 {% q( U% m3 A4 Y$ T0 P) ?
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I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
1 E9 R& ~( }& i S6 q$ k3 G6 ]thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face % B: h# y# w/ x0 {6 q2 Q7 a
the; l: H/ @- G" W& k+ r, T" A6 C
result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me & ~ a5 R; u1 i* f" O- I4 f
feel8 z1 ]- ^: s4 d" Z% C+ }' v" @
uncomfortable.' V% ]& o1 e6 n: y# z
$ N2 {# |1 Y" ~& I4 P2 d1 \My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention / w ]0 S! A5 \+ I! K) o
was* h! f" K& y6 G& w& d+ F) {& [
explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when
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1 N J5 c8 N- P$ @" ~% ncarried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son
5 b- p" ^0 N& l9 k: b% G/ g, ]" Xclapped. J. O' B+ s! u: D0 |3 ^
behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a % r1 c! h r7 v) i
sense) s: e+ y& g0 ?/ Z' M* _
of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I - C1 F; o& g$ b$ B; m% R
walked
; f' [3 @, U. Pover ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said
1 `+ g4 b4 T! P& }/ }4 r, asoftly,
S; B; }: }6 X* [# y/ mLet us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat w) r0 ~) C3 m5 A- H) w- y+ ?
upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I
3 k) |- { r+ J& kdrove
( |% p, o, t( V$ ~' R; xto the office.- S" i! T2 d; }6 J
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On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
9 S$ V' D! [! m( \2 e# D, ?chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse.
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0 [6 |* ]* m- B# trealized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a # E2 t- R6 h1 d/ ]& a
long6 O' D& y6 R# V8 h, A) c
time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles / k3 A' G$ w' z3 H
on
5 r: Q3 U0 o% o$ H8 l1 D# w: P2 \her face.9 Z" |# d* H) h( v
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On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being
" W1 a. D! U! K5 |* b6 Jdemolished. Be careful when you pass there.
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6 \+ E% c3 n/ P' G, q3 \* t9 cOn the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were * K# X) S6 b d1 w
still( }$ M6 Z, F( @7 e) _- r/ f
an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The
7 F. W5 }7 J3 z' w# {6 J* N$ r+ ivisualization of Dew became vague., u7 b# r/ ?/ z, L& C$ O
( b' a7 J/ Q& g2 QOn the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, 2 B6 ?! Z1 C9 v7 p, e" g5 D3 R
where$ [! T1 ?, g, F$ M# j9 B- U( a+ Y5 ~
she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I
: C' L) Z. i* K% k [. Ynodded.& B: t7 ~2 ]2 b8 r) L
The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.5 ?6 t8 B- K$ E* H A' ^7 S
: f8 z$ ]1 C: J- MI felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me9 b- n$ _+ n. K& K- ^2 H) U5 Y
stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She ' L# O: v3 a; w" O- U' ^4 z
was8 U" a _+ l1 o+ e3 |' B7 n1 l) E
picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a 2 i8 K7 p; Z9 g3 n( u c5 _
few
# S4 E) W+ _6 T* S/ `' Mbut could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have6 d% |* K0 o+ h7 e# {
grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she 1 `+ T1 u O% w- w6 C$ ]
was+ n8 c0 m8 Y% E7 I/ L" i3 M+ t
thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger.
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knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a " N* u9 q w$ y$ E0 A$ b
sense* [, E. N& B3 C1 E5 u% l5 V
of pain.. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.5 M& H5 G# u7 G+ F3 d( N. n `4 v
2 M# _. t8 P- \3 G1 d2 j4 jOur son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He 2 G" A+ q& Z! a" T9 p* _9 q
said. To# w: c4 v4 V9 r5 W( F
him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential " @) Y7 x; p l- _
part of$ a4 p j6 L) `5 }
his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I
A% M" f9 \1 Q% r/ L! l; I, ~turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last- w7 c5 e6 y2 q
minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the ; o0 F2 y3 L3 \$ |3 Z( y7 A5 L
sitting
, R/ }3 v, t! q7 K, \room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. ( n& E+ G: t$ }6 U
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held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her
$ _; `6 D. T# _. O: L% ~# `9 Rmuch/ M0 ?: P3 R! W9 {
lighter weight made me sad.
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On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. & Z1 L) J, J* Q( O* L7 _
Our
1 D3 D# W7 h" N$ |" f+ pson had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in
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arms until we are old.
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0 X; D0 H0 k% i& EI held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life/ `: d; V) V: d
lacked intimacy.- e' c( K' {. U0 d; a
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I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid
" B, b! I" L) A7 i; y) B2 u' W/ cany
3 q! W$ F1 o8 Y$ y1 Z- idelay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened ( ]& k" y( u- J% P1 V4 g& y
the" \, B) N. u- s8 p6 v2 J
door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.
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5 m7 e& p' j3 B3 E" v& h, jShe looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no& f: C' Z n; D$ J) Q/ h
fever.. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I 2 v2 p7 b1 ^8 {1 A5 X! n$ m- g
can
1 X" C3 j8 r j5 zonly say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring 5 i1 m1 T! _( ]9 v" Y; Q
probably
- d$ H2 H( N0 D/ Fbecause she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we
5 A( r1 q/ u- @5 d2 h6 Cdidn't
6 j# i& S4 J9 blove each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her . k5 H2 E" k* F4 s9 r9 M( {% L' u
into the
& o: M0 _. p, k0 r8 H: K4 a1 nhome, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am
q- b5 ]) ^8 W- c/ ^old.
' R. u6 }, C$ P& n0 ^+ pSo I have to say sorry to you.
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Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then
4 j* h6 C& W/ X w$ dslammed the' q _7 l1 h* V, A# b1 J# M
door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.
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6 R) f% m5 s; n6 O4 OWhen I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my 0 e4 d' S( e' x
wife% {0 x5 j* y2 Z! |, W
which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the ' U, Y5 ?, a6 p1 n4 h& {5 p, t, G- u, w
card. I
: M+ ^& ^) S& [% S: u6 csmiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.