Subject: Fw: Story from a husband - please read it slowly
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; z+ } @% i* _; H. F! zWhen You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms2 x0 d$ ~1 i& P& U: {8 j% {2 \& I
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7 w, b; E- J5 g/ n- OOn my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped L. m) {2 }* E
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front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of
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car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and
1 ^4 P( s( W2 j) N# Eshy..
7 y8 f: D' l% f* y4 W! K3 D" QI was a strong and happy bridegroom.2 g3 `4 e7 c7 j' V
" M9 }. E. F8 p! x( z% {5 B+ h# M2 GThis was the scene ten years ago.
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The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid;
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went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were
+ [6 g6 f+ a( F" o" vsteadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a ' T5 \0 ]- `8 i8 g' S7 g3 B* ^
civil+ F$ F1 [. j1 |. Q% X0 ~
servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the + b' |4 M! O# b/ ^, ]9 Y
same
) `" ^* u$ f1 h3 x/ rtime. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.
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/ X/ J& P% |3 N$ r8 p2 `6 SOur marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
. t, I5 b8 C8 r1 b" a! t, f% Gmore! {+ P2 ]9 ^: i/ B2 d0 T! c$ Q9 W
likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
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1 t9 ]( x% v/ i: v' a4 ?1 @- dDew came into my life.
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. O6 m2 k6 p6 ]7 I n- d- UIt was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from
; s5 `! G0 b3 U5 f( U+ p* ]2 Zbehind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This
% ~7 r0 P: m" R% v" Q" kwas the
& M @% U: T) Q/ |0 o7 rapartment I bought for her.3 G" @) f8 i/ Z% [$ z& P
1 {3 k, T' D" Q7 @9 e- UDew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her
% b7 p; N; L8 ?2 a) U9 Jwords
4 b% A/ D$ ^# Ysuddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife " G; R6 z5 c, k) q2 X
said,
5 G+ l1 {/ L' {Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.0 O& R( W8 e* u8 [9 k" L, c6 Y
8 t' P3 I' a6 R- y3 B7 v7 ]( _& f% uThinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my6 q% S2 e% A+ x' a- L% I" k5 g
wife.. But I couldn't help doing so.: R1 ?# j" d$ d% G% a, m) s
0 e& J1 j$ m; T$ [7 r/ a5 l" SI moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture,
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I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy,
7 B& I* ]" a3 wbecause
* K/ s5 S0 o- W7 [1 h0 T8 PI had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of
4 E+ O5 k& Q* Y7 gdivorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something7 a f+ _/ j- F c- Z% _5 E
impossible to me.4 K/ Y5 S$ m4 `4 l( ~8 {! c
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However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No
& e) V8 k2 g: D: ` z- y. ~matter how2 p" l' R" {# \- d6 \' d, [
mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.- D5 i# k! @7 R: f! R9 Z8 m
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Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing
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I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we
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TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's
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: |- P9 x. n" m8 `5 J' |This was the means of my entertainment.
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One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce,
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will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word.
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she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I 2 Q' o8 F1 ~: |1 U+ g; @8 y
couldn't E. l9 ]( c1 p% [
imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
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* t0 [$ l$ z6 ]4 A8 e# v8 aWhen my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all
! W) ?7 e6 @4 U# S* S+ Jthe
) t {6 N$ w- h+ F" w, Xstaff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide ; |4 a0 w! T- f/ j
something8 x9 F/ Z! s+ B. d+ z+ p& H
while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently ' t) {, L6 s6 r8 f
smiled at4 |3 d0 z0 o& W# T
my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.$ D" a7 C. f: P* O1 _2 S' u' i( I
l9 I: M2 w$ i6 TOnce again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live
2 c8 I/ P! h6 ~together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.& J+ \" w- d+ }9 R2 J- _+ N L
! \# I9 R; q# Q: ?, TWhen my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something
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tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the
' t1 f5 S+ z N/ Vhurt in
+ ?$ n$ D) Z1 H2 U3 g! |8 C- \her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let
/ u# R/ z& R) ~- V( i Kher
3 w( r: u `0 g3 @, Jknow what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic
% |3 \" b @6 I3 Ucalmly.
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She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, + M3 Y4 S8 ?! b8 q" ]
why?
& k( V, V- M' Y/ X3 M: kI'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her
# U( O: d& x) S' S3 q6 i% Pangry..
) |( r* H. Q5 Q8 K, }5 xShe threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
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7 t, ~6 g E" @: O# N9 N- o9 x1 |That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
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to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give
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satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
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With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
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she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She 9 U! L% s! I7 d
glanced0 U y; E9 J7 N% R+ v
at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The 5 c; y& L/ H, p6 M& A1 i
woman who
, C8 w3 ?% ~; r2 A; d6 H. Lhad been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But 0 n) V& g9 z" N$ A" J
I
6 j1 O* u* m b+ j" g6 Ucould not take back what I had said.9 d2 \+ k& R: g9 L' t
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Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected ' p" {% S e; ~5 }, W& ~
to
2 [6 [$ ? x: J' p0 @9 v0 _see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce
+ E4 U' v2 k7 i; W' A; @which
# ?" b, Z# l- t: ]' ghad obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.
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Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw
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writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I
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she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
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She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from 5 B* @& d- K% y4 ]3 `2 Z$ R
me, but
" i0 E0 L' Q* @7 `I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the
4 P Q3 G$ E2 b, Smonth's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was
8 _1 d8 I0 |- v+ U7 c$ c5 Zsimple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she$ @+ O! \5 y& m2 L& F5 S! P- y
didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.
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She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do 0 Q# }. R( I' v! X: a* G! x1 ^( [
you
+ U; E+ b9 |5 C1 \. Jstill remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This, ]' c( C. l1 a- r+ |* }' |
question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I 8 ~# K7 \% I2 Z0 g' d( J2 [
nodded2 m* S7 b/ e# Y" _8 H; g. }: ~8 c
and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I 3 T9 Q1 u# ]2 ~
have
7 B2 u a4 W/ K) V% n) h9 R; J- |a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when
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divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from + ?; A4 t4 N6 |
the
6 x4 k, {/ H2 x) r6 Z `bedroom to the door every morning.
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4 I/ w9 ]1 H, @9 |& QI accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished
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end her marriage romantically.
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" C R- G6 N* a. }0 z- DI told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
/ Q9 p3 w3 _+ x5 Y- D* m/ I# X0 Y* m5 Jthought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face
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3 @0 W) s3 s1 F* D8 F: I1 iresult of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me
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uncomfortable.
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' h+ ~) h" u1 y0 c |# G9 p% U/ DMy wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention + V! ~6 G: L5 v8 f: ]
was
. c$ d& i. K. T( C" Cexplicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when
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carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son
" Z7 u9 G. U$ N9 C' H6 x: G2 Vclapped% d( ?# Y" j0 R9 p% H! S; Q) Z S
behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a + a" m O' q8 _: n/ ^( ?' D
sense7 r' z+ _% `+ x% Q' X4 S# d: Y
of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I
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over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said 8 }, Z9 k, Q5 `0 ~+ `: P1 m' x
softly,
( H9 m/ s5 ^: [Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat
# b& w+ w. }( F$ ]upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I
5 |. I# O% s/ m8 v$ Q8 r& c9 I1 Jdrove
' j( H4 l3 b3 |9 ~9 Dto the office.
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/ X* Q+ i6 \+ Q6 R! O. jOn the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
4 `6 i( r+ s, [& A- ychest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. 1 }4 l' i$ N z9 R. D' j4 o# }0 ?
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realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a
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time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles
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, s% O0 y- L) T3 @8 [' |her face.5 Q d7 G4 L) z4 b' ?8 F$ j
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On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being
A$ Z" U3 j! ]( Bdemolished. Be careful when you pass there.
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! k6 g9 f/ X$ k# {3 X; r6 pOn the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were 4 J% z c! ~. n3 \6 z1 `( E6 D
still3 F% Q: R7 X& f' Y7 O
an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The2 V4 M3 V8 a- X: B
visualization of Dew became vague.
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On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as,
7 g' a% D2 f4 ^+ Z2 f9 k1 f1 iwhere
, M* o2 L4 n- q3 Y1 cshe put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I ' o" a* s4 H8 W7 Q4 F
nodded.- t# R) ?5 N- i& c0 x
The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this., f" @8 L( m. S [5 h
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I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
* s8 J& K3 R0 I+ G: c a$ Ustronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She
# u- ?+ G% b# H4 {! Vwas
+ V0 X' k2 r! H& J: m* s0 npicking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a
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but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have
( {: V& E; }- i$ `; P1 C! K8 B/ Ogrown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she + k3 P# e3 L& X2 i3 w7 B) V
was
0 m1 K5 G( p( z. r k+ dthinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger.
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8 x( Q7 }: [9 D- Z% ]knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a # @- j8 \( H' e) v r( S } b
sense
4 u$ f* k+ ]# f3 u* U) x: v( ^5 }, fof pain.. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.- m+ l( M/ j+ a/ u) W
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Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He / Y& } V' k) j- {; H* z
said. To# }' Y& ]2 y5 }+ V0 H" c: \
him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential 0 Q6 J8 W" h1 z3 G
part of
1 I1 h; B! x1 chis life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I% }* ~# o% h( w+ L1 X4 x
turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last9 z4 c: j. j/ }# Y
minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the 5 a8 u% Y; |! j, K k( W3 G% P* p
sitting
% f' \4 h$ E; T! `room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally.
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held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her
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lighter weight made me sad.
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+ A; b. k P# h) UOn the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. & F7 Z- E& o! `$ V( D( M
Our
: H8 }5 Q7 f8 D1 e1 t0 Fson had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in
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arms until we are old.
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$ I- ~$ \$ R- ]# F' H# V# c9 FI held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life
3 y$ ~9 r+ R( |lacked intimacy.6 x7 z# |; k; v, u5 c# o
. `+ q; i' N2 h4 ]I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid
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delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened
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door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious." x1 Q5 H0 {* n
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She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no5 [8 Z0 Q* [. n
fever.. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I
- |' V* {* k# ?6 r2 `0 z2 R Bcan" M) m# b, Q0 G
only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring + p$ N6 X7 e6 o
probably! O# F; D% a! P3 ]7 i5 `4 F4 ^, R
because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we
- L% `( z' G% M. F c6 v" Kdidn't
; i3 p, a. A$ Q% f6 Ylove each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her # t2 S* v8 ~4 R& U" M
into the( a6 e1 h# Z' \1 y# Q! [4 y
home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am
0 \4 c+ I1 N, h( Cold.
# W8 W- c" L7 k p# H1 m2 gSo I have to say sorry to you.
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, D! ^8 T7 Z/ m5 N3 T _0 ~Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then ! c5 T5 _) f9 ~ I4 _: u% H
slammed the* W: [, \8 U$ W/ K* k
door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.
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! |- H+ w! `% q) L; S+ ~4 XWhen I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my ! i: X+ |" T! Q) \! p
wife+ ^+ R ]1 V/ ], Z7 m3 y Q( a
which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the
/ l0 d3 m( S- s( i+ b `card. I
0 ^, v: \% ]/ J& m* Osmiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.
